Unfortunate Conflict of Interest
I keep trying to find a way to erase the line between you and I.
you are, it would seem, the irregularity, a syncopation in my heartbeat.
regrettably, the wiring of my blood and my desires began with you.
The day of my conception, September 1979,
led me to hollow out on this day, this present, this you.
Everything and everyone always leads me back to you.
an elevated honor for someone with such maladaptive wings.
You soar above me and beyond, always just out of reach.
perching on the periphery of every love that’s ever broken me.
we are connected, through blood, bone, time and space.
I stroke my lovers face and am reminded of your absence.
Would that you’d fly towards the sun and burst into flame.
***Quick piece from April 4th. I used the prompt from Napowrimo for this poem: http://www.napowrimo.net/2013/04/day-four/
Needs lots of work, but it happened! Another day down.
Untitled: I Collect Things
I collect things. broken humans, conch shells,
lullabies that no one has ever sang, and I
stack them, around my heart, underneath my ribcage
stuff them into the crevices until there is silence
Listen now, I must tell you how I feel.
Leave it to me to expose your broken edges.
you will stand near me unaware and
become the landing of a hail storm. It’s just what I do.
I am in this business – sanding, rounding you out
you must dull the knife before it sinks too deep.
I make no apologies to you. Except that is a lie.
I know no other way to elicit trust than to prostrate
myself over your ineptitude. Cover you up with
my incessant regrets until you are sainted and pure,
support every growl with the grace of my whimper.
Untitled: The Creep
my toes are used to creeping
inching along the narrow confines of yesterday
I wish to reconfigure them
crack open phalanges and realign
stack bone and tarsal and flesh
until they form a sturdy tourniquet for my brokenness
still I must not abandon the creep
the creep keeps me focused
the creep keeps me moving forward
the creep keeps me below the line of fire
Almost Fire Haiku
This pain in my chest
inhale and exhale flames, then
no more fire worship
*I know I took liberties with that last line. Fire. Damn fire.
Yay! It’s here! I’ll be participating in NaPoWriMo again this year. Many of you know that I get busy eeking out poems every April, and it’s one of my favorite times of year. Follow along, and check out other poets by looking up NaPoWriMo!
And get to writing!
Ten legs and two bikes and still no way to get to me. I am not hiding, I want to be found. In this space, I am a world onto myself. A walking galaxy. Guess that’s what really happens when Venus and Mars collide. They ricochet, repel, propel towards earth, the ground. Grounding. Hell. It’s safe down there. You already know the burn. You already see the flames. Those stars and the moon are just so damn unpredictable…
I bought a map the other day from some alien dude named Rumi who handed me the mishandled symbols and keys and whispered: You are already home. I told him to go fuck himself and to hand over the goods but perhaps I spoke in haste. Aliens know short cuts that we would never uncover.